Are you looking for awesome ice puns to use on your kids or coworkers? If you want some chilly cringe humor, this collection has the coolest ice puns to get through frigid winter weather.
You may ask, why do I need so many great ice puns? Well, variety is the ice of life and the weather forecast predicts a hail of witty puns!
Scroll down to see funny ice puns, or navigate themes with these links:
- Ice puns
- Random Ice Jokes
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Some of these ice puns will give you a good laugh and others will feel like getting a bucket of ice poured on your head. Don’t think ice about it and go with the floe!
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If you need a good ice pun, these are just the tip of the iceberg…
1. Have an ice day!
2. I only have ice for you.
3. Be chill, my beating heart.
4. I’m hanging on by a sled.
5. Icy what you did there.
6. All hail broke loose.
7. Give ‘em hail!
8. An icicle build for two.
9. This ice is snow joke!
10. I came, I thaw, I conquered.
11. I sleigh all day.
12. That’s the ice thing about winter.
13. I was going to take a walk in the snow last night, but then I got cold feet.
14. All is not frost.
15. If looks could chill.
16. Best in snow.
17. This winter, be sure to freeze the day!
18. Freeze things happen.
19. It was love at frost sight.
20. Say freeze
21. License to chill.
22. Calling them like icy them.
23. It’s snow laughing matter.
24. That bucket of ice is such an icesore.
25. Cool it.
26. An icicle made for two
27. Any way the wind froze.
28. Froze were the good old days
29. All hope is not frost
30. Go with the floe.
31. You can ski clearly now, the rain has gone.
32. Sleigh queen!
33. You don’t like my winter pun? How cold.
34. I’m trying to break the ice, but you just keep giving me the cold shoulder.
35. I hope you didn’t mind the last pun, it’s just a turn of freeze.
Random Ice Jokes
Ice jokes are snow laughing matter. These perfect winter jokes for icy weather are solid as a block of ice.
36. Why should anyone experiment with thin ice? It’s the best way to achieve a major breakthrough.
37. How did the hipster drown? He ice-skated before it was cool.
38. Did you hear about the birds and the freeze?
39. What did the arctic road say to the truck? Want to go for a spin?
40. Why did the new friends walk out onto the frozen lake together? It was a good way to break the ice.
41. What do you say to a snowman on the catwalk? Strike a froze.
42. I would tell you my best ice pun but it slipped my mind.
43. What did the woman say after she slipped and fell on the ice? Nothing, she just gave everyone the cold shoulder.
44. What does Batman put in his drinks? Just-ice.
45. Why can’t you get a job at the ice rink? There’s a hiring freeze.
46. Did you hear about the traveling snowman? He did his sales calls by i-cicle.
47. Did you hear the arctic circle has its own toy store? They’ve called it Fisher Ice.
48. Did you hear about the adventurous snowman? He had quite the ice-capade.
49. What happens when an ice cube gets angry? It boils with anger, and then lets off some steam.
50. Come hail or high water.
51. Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Because he wanted cold hard cash!
52. Why didn’t the maintenance crew smooth the ice for the hockey game? They slipped up.
53. The ski trip started off well, but then it all went downhill.
54. Why is the letter B so cold? Because it’s in the middle of the AC.
55. Why did Dracula take cold medicine in winter? To stop his coffin.
56. What do you call a cold crocodile in winter? A refrigerator
57. What do you get when you cross a bee and a lizard? A blizzard
58. What’s an Ig? A snow house without a loo.
59. Why don’t ants catch colds? They have good anty bodies.
60. I thought we were going sledding, but we went skiing instead. You might say I was mis-sled.
61. What do you call kids that love to spend time on the ice? Chill-dren.
62. Do I love ice cream? You sherbet I do!
63. Why did the girl walk into the ice cream store with an umbrella? She heard there were going to be sprinkles.
64. Ice cream cones make for great journalists because they always get the scoop.
65. I’m insecure about my favorite flavor of ice cream. Call it my Neapolitan Complex.
66. Stealing ice cream? I don’t cone-done that behavior!
67. I wrote my dessertation on ice cream puns.
68. That’s the cone-iest joke I’ve ever heard.
69. What do you wear to the ice cream shop? Your sundae best.
70. What’s every ice cream parlor owner’s side hustle? Sundae school teacher.
71. What did one ice cream cone say to another? “With you, anything is popsicle.”
72. Sugar and ice and everything nice.
73. Why is ice cream so bad at tennis? Because it has a soft serve.
74. What is an ice cream’s favorite show? Game of Cones.
75. Why did the ice cream van break down? Because there was a rocky road!
76. What does the ice cube say? I was water before it was cool.
77. What did one ice cube say to another? Ice to meet you.
78. What did one ice cube say to another? You’re so cool.
79. What is the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush? One crushes boats the other brushes coats.
80. What did one ice cube say to another? I only have ice for you.
81. What did one ice cube say to another? It was ice to see you.
82. What do you call a lonely ice cube? Ice-olated.
83. What did the ice cube say to the fire? You’re hot, but I’m cooler.
84. No one is born cool, except for an ice cube.
85. How do ice cubes fall in love? Love at frost sight.
86. What did the ice cube say after watching a sad movie? “It brought tears to my ice.”
87. What did the ice cube reply after receiving a compliment? What an ice thing to say.
88. If the formula for water is H₂O, then what is the formula for ice? H₂O cubed.
89. How do you get an ice cube to melt faster? Get into a heated argument with it.
90. What do you call a cat on ice? One cool cat!
91. Why does everyone invite Jack Frost to their party? Because he’s so cool.
92. Do you know what Jack Frost loves to eat? He always has ice-bergers.
93. What does Jack Frost drink before bed? An ice cap.
94. What does Jack Frost want to be when he grows up? A great ice-tronaut.
95. What does Jack Frost do if his house falls apart? Igloos it back together.
96. Why doesn’t Jack Frost like going to parties? Because he wants to be ice-olated.
97. What’s Jack Frost’s favorite song? Ice, Ice, Baby.
98. How does jack Frost get around? A b-ice-icle.
99. Why is Jack Frost good at poker? He keeps an ice up his sleeve.
100. What’s Jack Frost’s favorite book? Of Ice and Men.
101. What did Jack Frost say to his best friend? It’s ice to have a friend like you.
102. What do you sing on Jack Frost’s birthday? Freeze a jolly good fellow!
103. What’s the best advice Jack Frost ever gave? Freeze the day.
104. What’s some Jack Frost wisdom? The best things in life are freeze.
105. What does Jack tell people when he wants to be alone? Get frost!
106. What does Jack Frost think when he’s meeting new people? I just want to make a good frost impression.
Arnold Schwarzenegger got some pretty freezy puns in Batman & Robin. He played Mr. Freeze, one of the movie’s main villains, alongside Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy. I hope you have ice in your veins because these icy puns will make your blood run cold. Mr. Freeze is famous for holding up his freeze gun and shouting one of these cold puns:
107. “My Condition Has Left Me Cold To Your Pleas Of Mercy”
108. “The Ice Man cometh!”
109. “You’re not sending me to the cooler!”
110. “Stay cool, Birdboy.”
111. “Alright everyone, chill.”
112. “Cool party!”
113. “Allow me to break the ice, my name is Freeze. Learn it well, for it is the chilling sound of your doom.”
114. “Tonight, hell freezes over!”
115. “Tonight’s forecast… a freeze is coming!”
116. “Let’s kick some ice!”
117. “It’s A Cold Town”
118. “Freeze In Hell, Batman”
119. “What Killed The Dinosaurs? The Ice Age”
120. What’s a snowman’s favorite meal? Brrrr-eakfast.
121. Time waits for snow man.
122. It takes one to snow one.
123. What did one snowman say to another? Stay frosty my friend.
124. What’s a snowman’s favorite month? Decem-brrr.
125. Why shouldn’t you trust a snowman? They’re always up to snow good.
126. What do snowmen do when the weather is too hot for hats and scarves? They change into puddles.
127. Do you want to build a snowman? Promise Olaf you forever.
128. Why is it dangerous for a snowman to fall in love? His heart might melt.
129. Don’t make the snowman angry. He might have a meltdown.
130. There’s snowman better for me. I glove this one!
131. What’s a snowman’s favorite drink? Frost-tea.
132. What a snowman’s favorite dessert? Ice cream.
133. Why do snowmen have a poor sense of smell? They can only smell carrots.
134. Why didn’t the snowman go to the Christmas party? He just wanted to chill.
135. What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman? Frostbite.
136. What do snowmen eat for lunch? Brrr-gers.
137. What do you call a snowman’s dog? A slush puppy.
138. What do snowmen call their offspring? Chill-dren.
139. No one is above the thaw.
140. That was below the melt.
141. Shovel off!
142. Parting is such sleet sorrow.
143. Every day I’m shoveling.
144. Home sleet home
145. Say it ain’t snow
146. Snow what?
147. I love you snow much.
148. There’s snow way out of winter.
149. This winter is snow joke.
150. Best in snow.
151. Snow place like home.
152. Snowbody’s perfect.
153. I need to parka my car, but there’s too much snow!
154. Go with the snow.
155. Snow thy enemy.
156. Ice simply love it when it snows.
157. There’s snow time like the present.
158. I’m walking in a winter pun-derland.
159. We’re season the day!
160. Winter is un-brr-lieveable!
161. I’d chill for a cup of tea.
162. Winter is here, weather you like it or not.
163. I usually prefer cold weather, but only to a certain degree.
164. This winter is a frostrating situation.
165. Any way the wind froze.
166. Go with the ebbs and floes.
167. Let’s list the froze and cons.
168. You snow it to yourself to make the best of winter.
169. How is throwing a dictionary similar to birds flying south for winter? They are both flying information.
170. Winter is snow much fun.
171. Chill out, cold weather is snow problem.
172. Enjoying this weather like there’s snow tomorrow
173. Fall turns into winter before your very ice.
174. During a cold winter it’s easy to feel ice-olated.
175. Feeling cold? Go stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.
176. Where do penguins keep their savings? In the snow bank.
177. What do penguins wear on their feet at night? Slippers.
178. Why did the penguin jump off the iceberg? He got cold feet.
179. What do penguins like to eat? Brrrrritos.
180. What’s black and white, black and white, black and white? A penguin rolling down a hill!
181. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
182. What is a penguin’s favorite movie? Frozen.
183. What is a penguin’s favorite family member? Aunt Arctica.
184. What do penguins eat for breakfast? Frosties.
185. What’s a penguin’s favorite pasta? Penguini.
186. Why are polar bears so popular at parties? They can easily break the ice.
187. What did the polar bear say to his best friend? “It’s snow much fun when you are around.”
188. Where do polar bears go for dancing? To the snow ball.
189. Did you hear about the polar bear who got caught in the heavy rain? He is a drizzly bear now.
190. What kind of currency polar bears use? Cold cash.
191. Have you heard about the polar bear who lives next door? He seems to be an ice guy.
192. How does a mother polar bear tuck her baby into bed? Using sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
193. What is polar bears’ favorite kind of accessory? An ice cap.
194. Why was there a bear civil war? they were polar-iced.
195. What was the polar bear doing at the North Pole? He was chilling.
196. What does a polar bear say when playing hide-and-seek? Icy you.
197. Polar bears hate snow jokes, they think they are un-bear-able.
198. Why is a polar bear a cheap pet to have? Because it lives on ice.
199. What’s a polar bear’s favorite movie? The Blizzard of Oz.
200. The polar ice caps are melting. It’s thaw-dropping.